There is nothing enviable about being "Man enough"


There is nothing enviable about being "Man enough"

There is nothing enviable about being "Man enough"

A subtle misogynist once made a remark about me, intended to hurt but I just found it plain silly. He said "You are a feminist because you don't have a dick. You want go be a man but you cannot no matter how hard you try, even if you turn transgender.

In no way do I claim feminism because I am in anyway jealous of the male gender and to be very honest there is nothing enviable about being male. Patriarchy affects them too. it's simply a case of choosing between two evils, one disguised as the lesser evil.
Disclaimer: there is no such thing as a lesser evil

Should I be envious about the notion that they are to be burdened with unending demands or that they are meant to be rehabilitation centers for shallow pick mes? Or the fact that they are seen as stones, not humans prohibited from feeling hurt or insecure? Some men would rather die than talk about how they feel because it is supposedly  feminine and portrays them as weak and that is "disgusting"
Subconsciously they are programmed by the society that being dead to emotions  is supposedly masculine and it is alarmingly dangerous!

It can escalate to dangerous points, that is why the male would see nothing wrong in rape and wouldn't make any sense of why the female should make a fuss. In fact, that is why any male reading this might not mark sense of this😅. They are supposed to be man enough

Truth be told  being dead to emotions is not a sign of being masculine or strong or tough. it is barbaric and inhumane, primitive.
You are not a Man you are human and you ought to feel.

In fact, I dare you to😅, guys like dares don't they?
In the words of Justin Caldoni: "Are you strong enough to be sensitive? To be vulnerable? Are you brave enough to listen to the women in your life, can you put aside that ego and listen? Are you strong enough to show that bravery by standing up for the women around you when you hear that locker talk about exploiting a woman sexually, when she is being objectified, so that one day no woman has to come out and say the words 'ME TOO'
Are you brave enough to talk about your own hurt? Your feelings?”

To use that louder voice to help protect the feminine? Patriarchy has given you that edge, use it against it!
Are you brave enough to reject male privileges given by culture and religion when you realise they affect others negatively?
Because the truth is Men are not just a part of the problem, they are the problem.
The glass ceiling exists because they put it there.

That moment you stop pampering that babe of yours who feels entitled to your hard earned money simply because she is female and tell her to go get a fuvking job!
When you let yourself feel human and embrace those emotions, develop the emotional intelligence to handle them instead of denying it like how patriarchy asks you to, it all comes back to you, you become sane.

There's a better way, you don't have to be subject to patriarchy.

In the words of Simone De Beauver, "One is not born woman, one becomes woman"
in that same Vein,  you are not born Man you become Man.
But you are definitely born Human.

© Deborah Oludimu

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